Controversial ad sparks debate over sex offender registry
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SEATTLE -- In some cases, it's "a list for life." The sex offender registry forces convicted criminals to stay in the spotlight.
Not everyone wants to stay there.
"Those two words, 'sex offender,' they make me sick to my stomach," said one such former criminal.
We protected his identity so he could be candid about what he had done. He doesn't want you to forgive him or forget what he did. He just wants you to shift your perception of his crime.
"I did something wrong and I manned up to it. I admitted it in court. I took my punishment," he said.
It was nearly two decades ago, when he was 18-years old. Half his lifetime ago. He says that night he was "drunk beyond anything I've ever been almost to the point of falling down."
He was drunk and out of control with a female friend.
"Kind of in and out of consciousness, not really able to function, and I took advantage of her," he said.
She couldn't give consent. It was a sex crime.
"I agreed. I plead guilty. I did something very wrong," he said.
In the time since, he's been registered as a sex offender, done right by the law and paid his dues. But he wants a change. He wants to get off the sex offender registry.
"Having to be subject to this public embarrassment and scrutiny for the rest of my life -- that seems a little harsh," he said.
Which is where a controversial ad comes in, placed on the back of alternative newspapers. It's from attorney Brad Meryhew.
"Sex offender registration got you down? Give us a call; we might be able to help,"Meryhew said.
Under Washington state law, certain lower-level offenders have the option to petition a judge for removal from the registry. The worst criminals aren't eligible. Even if a judge agrees that the offender is reformed, it doesn't expunge the conviction from the record. It just takes the offender off the list and some tracking websites.
"We are one of the toughest states in regards to registration and community notification," said Kecia Rongen with the state sentence review board.
She says the original 1990s-era sex offender laws haven't caught up to actual research.
"Treatment does work. Recidivism rates for juvenile sex offenders are fairly low," she said.
In a way, the registry could become a form of punishment. That's fine by Deborah Kaye -- especially after she saw Meryhew's ad.
"It seemed so glib. 'Sexual predator registration got you down?' I hope so," she said.
Kaye has counseled sexual abuse victims for years and says even though the law allows some offenders to leave the list, some punishments shouldn't be swept away.
"The power over another person. It's always been about power. So that wiring is often hard to unwire, if you will," she said.
While she said she was shocked and appalled, she sees the conflict so many face in the legal system.
"Can people be turned around? I'm sure there are, I'm sure there are many. I'm conflicted," she said.
Meryhew knows it's a controversial business. Some people have called and yelled at his office, but he shares his clients' stories to change minds.
"What we're speaking to are those people who can't find work, can't find housing, can't get a relationship going, have trouble with their families," he said.
Kaye isn't entirely sold. She feels some crimes don't deserve compromise.
"Sexual predators hunt. And we need to know who the hunters are," she said.
The man who admitted his crimes says he isn't that hunter. He wants his chance to prove it to everyone.
"I've had to own this, because I did it. There's no other way around it," he said.
Not everyone wants to stay there.
"Those two words, 'sex offender,' they make me sick to my stomach," said one such former criminal.
We protected his identity so he could be candid about what he had done. He doesn't want you to forgive him or forget what he did. He just wants you to shift your perception of his crime.
"I did something wrong and I manned up to it. I admitted it in court. I took my punishment," he said.
It was nearly two decades ago, when he was 18-years old. Half his lifetime ago. He says that night he was "drunk beyond anything I've ever been almost to the point of falling down."
He was drunk and out of control with a female friend.
"Kind of in and out of consciousness, not really able to function, and I took advantage of her," he said.
She couldn't give consent. It was a sex crime.
"I agreed. I plead guilty. I did something very wrong," he said.
In the time since, he's been registered as a sex offender, done right by the law and paid his dues. But he wants a change. He wants to get off the sex offender registry.
"Having to be subject to this public embarrassment and scrutiny for the rest of my life -- that seems a little harsh," he said.
Which is where a controversial ad comes in, placed on the back of alternative newspapers. It's from attorney Brad Meryhew.
"Sex offender registration got you down? Give us a call; we might be able to help,"Meryhew said.
Under Washington state law, certain lower-level offenders have the option to petition a judge for removal from the registry. The worst criminals aren't eligible. Even if a judge agrees that the offender is reformed, it doesn't expunge the conviction from the record. It just takes the offender off the list and some tracking websites.
"We are one of the toughest states in regards to registration and community notification," said Kecia Rongen with the state sentence review board.
She says the original 1990s-era sex offender laws haven't caught up to actual research.
"Treatment does work. Recidivism rates for juvenile sex offenders are fairly low," she said.
In a way, the registry could become a form of punishment. That's fine by Deborah Kaye -- especially after she saw Meryhew's ad.
"It seemed so glib. 'Sexual predator registration got you down?' I hope so," she said.
Kaye has counseled sexual abuse victims for years and says even though the law allows some offenders to leave the list, some punishments shouldn't be swept away.
"The power over another person. It's always been about power. So that wiring is often hard to unwire, if you will," she said.
While she said she was shocked and appalled, she sees the conflict so many face in the legal system.
"Can people be turned around? I'm sure there are, I'm sure there are many. I'm conflicted," she said.
Meryhew knows it's a controversial business. Some people have called and yelled at his office, but he shares his clients' stories to change minds.
"What we're speaking to are those people who can't find work, can't find housing, can't get a relationship going, have trouble with their families," he said.
Kaye isn't entirely sold. She feels some crimes don't deserve compromise.
"Sexual predators hunt. And we need to know who the hunters are," she said.
The man who admitted his crimes says he isn't that hunter. He wants his chance to prove it to everyone.
"I've had to own this, because I did it. There's no other way around it," he said.
How sad. "It is all about power," one commented. Another lost a childhood, apparently many years ago. Kick God out of society, and these are the things left for discussion.
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God says we are tempted by stuff (possessions), sensuality (what feels good), and status (how we can lord over others). God says these are not sin, but sin follows, or righteousness, depending on how we react. Rape being all about "power" is just a godless mantra of feminism, and certainly not an explanation of the motives of the drunkard raping the (apparently drunk) victim. Truth fails.
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Even more tragic is the professional victim. No doubt that which was perpetrated against him/her (canât tell) was a heinous crime, but (also assuming) from his/her admission to a lust for multiple sex partners he/she does not also see it as a sin before God. He/she has probably not read that God wills that we forgive. He/she doesnât understand that Godâs command we have a forgiving heart is not for the benefit for the perpetrator, but for we who have been transgressed, that we might not live the rest of our lives in self victimization.Â
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We will all stand before God. "One such former criminal," taking his words at face value, having repented, never again committing so vile an act, might stand before God clean, forgiven of all sin, should he humbly ask of Him. The cold of heart, who reject God, unwilling to forgive, out of righteous indignation casting the same condemnation upon the repentant and the unrepentant. They who reject God reject all He is, and all He says.
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Thou hater of God, grit your teeth, but take it up with God, not with me. Iâm just passing on wisdom from His Word. For me, some need to remain on "The List," but perhaps some may safely be removed that they reenter society as productive, taxpaying citizens. Only God can make a correct call on that, but if and only if "one such" was truthful, Iâd agree, it is my opinion he needs to come off the list..
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Yeah, well what about the victims? you may have "manned" up to it, taken some punishment, but you will NEVER have to live with the punishment constantly, day in, day out, like us victims have to.
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I have absolutely ZERO sympathy for ANY sex offender.  Nothing will ever bring back my childhood, or life as it should have been.
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If I have to live with my pain the rest of my life, and be reminded DAILY how traumatic it was, then so should you.
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You can't find a job? So what. I had to take many days off my job for all kind of medical problems you caused me.
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You can't find a house? So what. I am haunted in my own house, old neighbhorhood, and can't even visit the town I used to live in because of you.
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Can't find a wife? So what, I had to tell every partner I was with, whether or not I had sex with them, that I had a life long std because you gave it to me.
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Tough. You chose to do what you did, you ruined my life and ruined yours, and countless other's.  Live with it, scumbag.